All of this is part of my thought process every few months (perhaps in truth its as i sit typing up each and every single blog post.) And then as much as i long to continue writing and sharing my photographs, and keeping track of my comings and goings throughout the seasons, the feeling of it all being with no purpose and at a detriment to my soul forces me to just stop. And i relax, my camera sits unused and i really feel calmer and just better. And i am again thankful and grateful for my life, and can put everything into context and know that at this point in my life i will have the least amount of time for past-times, but its ok, God willing that will change and a day will come when i have children in school and 6 hours a day to catch up on all the pleasure time which so often right now consists of switching off in front of mind numbing tv or catching up with housework (which isn't so much of a chore by the way).
My husband says that the way i write suggests that life is perfect here and its an illusion to how my life is. I don't usually write about the bad days because im not worthy of sympathy and in truth, right now, the bad days are not often, i praise God for that. This year has had some of the hardest trials for us and has pushed us in ways we would never have imagined. But everything which i do share here is truth and i think its a good snapshot of parts of my life. I hope that i never seem pretentious? It worries me that i may.
But im certainly ready to write again, but i must give this blog a purpose. I want to share knowledge and really inspire people to live more responsibly, and for me and you to be happy with what we have been blessed with. We can live the good life we want to live, and if we cant then perhaps its because those things really aren't important or they are just not for us right now. This life is a very short journey and closeness to God is the purpose, for all of us, whether we are believers or not. I'm looking forward to sharing much more, and i hope that you, my dear readers (and you really are dear to me - i check my stats!) will enjoy this place with me.
(Taken last week at Bradgate Country Park, with an iphone. Search for Bradgate park in my sidebar and you will see more of my photos from previous visits...)